Monday, March 13, 2006

Alternative 2005 Movie Awards 3



And here are my choices:

BEST PICTURE
“Batman Begins”
"The Constant Gardener"
"The 40 Year-old Virgin"
"Syriana"

(I haven’t seen “Kiss Kiss Bang Bang” or “A History of Violence” yet but I’m willing to bet either film would fill the last spot on my top five. If I wind up not liking them, then throw in “Capote” or “Munich”)

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR OR ACTRESS NOT NOMINATED FOR ANY MAJOR ACTING AWARD
Kevin Costner “The Upside of Anger”
Joan Allen “The Upside of Anger”
Owen Kline “The Squid and the Whale”
Michelle Williams “The Baxter”
The cast of “The Aristocrats”
Amy Adams for "Junebug." Yes, she was nominated for an Oscar, but she's so freakin' good in this movie she deserves another mention.


MOVIE THAT WAS FAR BETTER THAN I ANTICIPATED
“The Skeleton Key”
“Fever Pitch”
“Fun With Dick and Jane”
“Match Point”
“The Upside of Anger”

MOVIE I AM MOST GLAD I DID NOT SEE
"Hide and Seek"
"The Pacifier"
"Monster-In-Law"
"Get Rich or Die Tryin"
"Harry Potter and the blah blah blah"

WORST MOVIE EVER
"Aeon Flux"
"The Dukes of Hazzard"
"Elizabethtown"
"Kicking and Screaming"
"Rent"

MOST DISTURBING COUPLE


Tom Arnold and Maggie Gyllenhaal in “Happy Endings.” Yes, there is a love scene. I can't imagine anyone out there would care, but just in case: this movie also features a shot of Lisa Kudrow's nipple.

WORST MOVIE TITLE (based on the boxofficemojo.com list of 2005 releases)
Balzac and the Little Chinese Seamstress
The Beat that My Heart Skipped
Isn’t This a Time! A Tribute to Harold Leventhal
Gory Gory Hallelujah
Margaret Cho: The Assassin Tour
One Bright Shining Moment: The Forgotten Summer of George McGovern
The Prize Winner of Defiance, Ohio
Searching for the Wrong-Eyed Jesus
Winning Girls Through Psychic Mind Control (This movie stars Bronson Pinchot!)

1 Comments:

Blogger Sam Goldberg said...

Great post, as usual. One request...can you post pictures that are any smaller? Start using the large image setting, homeboy. I mean the fog is so thick I can't even see my own cataracts! What's my first name? I...don't...know...

10:31 PM  

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